My heart is breaking...I am LOST.
For the brother I have found is in critical condition & may not recover.
He is in the last stages of Huntington's Disease.
He has not spoken or eaten or moved in 2 years.
This disease is shattering.
I have given the hospital a DNR order...is this the gift?
To be able to free my brother from his earthly chains?
The next decision is even tougher, withdrawal of care.
I don't know if I have the strength to do that.
I don't know if it is needed or wanted or warranted...I am LOST.
I am my brother's keeper, but what is the right thing to do for him?
Would God have let me find him, just to take him so quickly?
Calling all ANGELS to show me the way,
to give me PEACE in the decisions,
to give me HOPE in a heaven where we will all be together again,
to give me FAITH in a GOD who knows better then me, the reason for such despair here on earth.
Pray for me & my brother dear friends, as we are in the dark & are in need of LIGHT.
XOXO
vintagesusie
37 comments:
Oh sweetie, I am sorry you are having to make these difficult decisions. The gifts we receive may be in our hands for a short while, and it is only human nature to want to keep them a little longer before they fly away. Some gifts are also meant to be passed on to one who needs it the most.
It is not for me to say what you should do. Perhaps you already know the answer. Just know that I am thinking about you and praying for peace in the coming days for both you and your brother.
Howdy Susie
Oh dear sweet precious one I have nothing of profound ,all knowing ,or guidance of wisdom to share ,but I will pray dear one for you and your brother for the light of God to shine so bright that it is perfectly clear for you to see the path you are to take .
Heavenly Father I lift up these two prcious ones unto you and ask for your divine healing ,wisdom,comfort ,guidance and deliverance with peace to prevail now in their lives in Christ name I pray amen .
Oh that's so hard. And only you can make the decision, and you'll know in your heart when it's made. But I'll be here for you! You have my email address (it's in my blog profile) and can use it any time.
Praying for you and your brother.
hugs,
Danielle
Hi Dear Susie,
Another Susie here...only my Mom calls me susie though!!!
Susie, You are still in the presence of Angels And so is your Dear Johnny!!!
I am praying that the Lord will give you both wings to fly over these so very difficult days.
You and your brother Johnny will always be together here on Earth as it will be in Heaven.
I lost an older brother 27 years older than me two years ago...because of our father and other situations I never got to meet my brother until one afternoon my husband drove me up to Tennesee to meet him. He had cancer and already had Chemo but he could not survive it. I held his hand and sat by his side. I gave him water when he asked for it and we told each other that we loved each other. The next morning my beloved half brother was taken by the Lord. I thank the Lord that I did get to meet my brother if only for a few hours and hold his hand, and knowing "we" were so happy to have finally met each other.
We are given gifts from the Lord and some last a lifetime while some gifts are as fleeting as a shooting star.
Put your Faith in the Lord. He is always there and He already knows our hearts.
Be there with Johnny and hold his hand and tell him you love him. God will take care of the rest my dear Susie.
May the Lord enfold you and Johnny in his
Loving and understanding arms.
Susan
I am so sorry, you and your brother will be in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs, Terri
Your post brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry for what you and your brother are going through and I have no idea how I'd feel if I had to make similar decisions about one of my siblings. I'll be keeping both of you in my thoughts and prayers. May God bless you at this time, Michelle.
so very sorry for your heartache...i will keep you and your brother in my prayers and will also pray that YOUR prayers are answered my friend.
blessings...
Susie: I will of course pray for you and your brother. Remember, God never gives us more than we can handle. You are not alone, you are surrounded by earthy and heavenly angels, as is your brother. Listen to what you know and what your heart is saying. You'll know. I have faith in you. The Olde Bagg, Linda
Susie, so sorry for your brother. You have a tough decision. I only know that if I was in his situation, I would want everyone to let me go. No more suffering. His work is done here. He is in God's hands now. You will know what the right thing to do is. Sincerely Judy
Susie, I will be thinking of you both. I went through a similar experience with my mother and it is very difficult. I speak only for my situation that it was a last gift I was able to give my mother and end her suffering and set her free. You will know what to do and you will do the right thing because whatever you do will be from love. Hugs and Prayers, Ann
Search your heart sweet friend.
My Heart goes out to you.
Hugs,
Lisa
Dear Susie, I am so sad for you and your brother. I have no wise words, but I do send love to give you strength through the dark days ahead.
xxx
Prayers for you both and that you'll hear what God wants you to do in a quiet moment. Hugs!
oh dear Susie,
I am finally dropping in to visit and find you in this heartbreaking situation.
You will know in your heart the right thing to do. I'm so sorry.
Lucy
I believe that God brought you together to help your brother with his journey. Listen to your heart and all will be right. My prayers are with you! Your friend... xoso Sandy O
Praying for you and this situation. Praying the Holy Spirit will lead and guide you. These are hard decisions to have to make. You are in my prayers.
Dearest Suzie,
My heart is breaking for you. I'm certainly not the one to give you spiritual advice. But consider that you and your brother shared a childhood, one marked by the tragedy of your mother's illness and death. So you probably know more about what he would want than you may think.
Sit quietly and ask yourself what you would want him to do for you if the circumstances were reversed. Think about the brother you remember. I believe God has probably already put the answer there for you find; you only have to ask the right question.
Maybe God put it in your heart to go see him because your brother needs you to remember that you do "know" him as he truly is, outside this terrible disease. Maybe you are the only one who can know what he would want.
It will be hard no matter what you decide. I don't know if I've helped you. But please know that you will be in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers.
Hugs,
Susan
Susie,
I am so sorry my friend that the decision is in your hands...but it is in God's hands to decide when. Listen and you will know, He brought you together for reasons beyond your understanding, and He will give you the strength dear Susie. I know He will because He said so....
My heart is heavy with grief for you and your brother.....My thoughts will be with you...
Susie, Just breathe!!!! Take deep cleansing breaths. You don't have to decide this today! Just give yourself & your heart TIME. The right answer will come... He has been gone for a long time & sweet girl YOU are not making this decision!!!! KNOW THAT! God is making the real decisions. The other is just earthly trappings & legaleeeez made by man for man. Take heart sweet child of God. He is simply making the journey we all make. His has been a hard path but, he will be free of the pain. DON'T take on his pain for yourself. Love him for what you can & let him go. For he is not YOURS to hold. Hope that helps. Call me if you need it. HUGS!
Charlene Pearl.
I am so sorry you are having to go through this torment. I will pray for you and your brother and that God will show you the way.
My heart aches for you, for I know exactly what you are feeling. God Does work mysteriously. We are not meant to understand All. It is heart-wrenching to let go. When we finally told our sister it was O.K., she could carry on with God still guiding her way, it was most difficult, but as if a weight had lifted. I pray for peace for you and your brother, Johnny. I used to think that God does not give us more than we can handle, BUT, He Does, so we remember to Turn to HIM. You and Johnny will have a most wonderful reunion one day. Until then, prayer is a powerful thing, and mine are with you both, also.
BlessYourLovingHeart
I am sad for you Susie. God will help you if you have faith in him. You both found each other not long ago and that made you both so happy. Think that you both now have the peace knowing that you love each other. God know best!
love ya, Judy
Susie, I am truly sorry you have to go thru this heartache and sorrow.
In answer to your question.... I will say this...having lived with a chronic pain condition for over 33 years now...I will tell you this...I do not want ANYONE to "save" me from leaving this Earth...as I will be MORE than happy to leave and be with the Lord and my daughter who is already waiting for me there...and to be released from this painful bodily prison called Fibromyalgia... that I have lived in for so long.
GOD does know the "why" of such things..and it will make PERFECT sense to us when we arrived in Heaven.
Let him go...with your BLESSINGS...and he will THANK YOU FOR IT...when you see each other again....I promise you !!!
Rose
Susie, my heart goes out to you. Your post is heartbreaking. I pray that you will find the right decision. Although it was way too short, I am glad that you found Johnny and that you are his angel here on earth. You are in my prayers, dear friend.
God is with you, and your brother. Do not fear,you will be guided by His love. My heart and prayers will be for you both tonight.
Oh Susie, I am so sorry to hear that you are faced with the most difficult thing you will probably ever have to do. Above all else, be, and listen to your heart.....there you will find God's guidance and love. May you feel the wings of angels surrounding you and God's love as he holds you and your brother in the palm of his hand.
"Her" and Romeo
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
My dearest Susie,
Illness and death is a journey we all must take, and each must go alone. As you know I had to make some written decisions concerning what my wishes were when I was very ill.I believe that it's all a part of the master's plan, a giant step on the road to home. I believe that it would truly be a blessing to no longer be in pain and your soul will be set free. I told Phil that I would want him to always remember the love that was onced shared. Miss me but let me go. Remember all the good times that you and Johnny shared and one day when you meet again you will only see the happy healthy Johnny that you used to know. And when you are feeling lonely or sad, Please reach out to your friends that love you and are always here for you! You and Johnny are in my prayers!
Susie,
I am so sad to read this. I find that if I can still myself and do deep inside, I can hear the voice of God talking to me...not always, but at times. You have been given more than enough advice. i guess what I really need to give you is my prayers,
Love,
Suz
My heart goes out to you as I had to make a similar decision years ago. You will be in my prayers and I send you a hug across the miles!
What ever decision you make will be the right one. God put your brother back in your life for a reason - one that may have no meaning at the moment, but it will come to light one day. Cherish all the memories you were fortunate to have with him and know that he will be freed from his pain on this earth. When my sister and nephew died last year I thought my heart would be broken forever. But I now know that they are at peace and happy and joyous and live through me and with me everyday. My heart and thoughts are with you dear Susie.
I am sorry that your heart is breaking!!! I think you were brought to your brother just exactly when he needs you most. Your familial love and devotion is what will give you the compassion and strength necessary to get both of you thru this most difficult of times. Your words bring tears to my eyes and make me think of when my father was dying almost 9 years ago. But I am so thankful he is no longer suffering in his earthly body and his earthly life. Sending you love & friendship across the miles.
Oh Susie,
This can not be easy or even fathomable at this time. God led you to your brother but not to just take him as you said. He led you to your brother so you could find him again. So, he would not be alone when it was his time to go. To know he had his loving sister with him and God let you find him so you could let him know it is okay to go now. He waited those two years for you.
I am praying for you.
tammy
Oh Susie, my heart goes out to you! I`m sure, God will lead you to the right decision. You are in my thoughts and prayers,
Sue
You will receive the strength you need to make your decisions even in your dark times. You're in my thoughts, my friend...
hugs, Sue
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